God = Comma?

I'm not the first one to make this comment, but it's the first time I've experienced it in a painful way.

I received a call today from a worker at Teen Mania who is responsible for organizing a youth event called Acquire the Fire. I took our high schoolers to an ATF event last year and vowed never to do it again for reasons I'll refrain from posting about here.

So anyways, I talked to this girl a little bit about why we would not be attending this year's event, which went fine only to lead her to ask me a question...can I pray for you? I was like, "sure."

And then it began...

God we just thank you............Father.......Lord..........God............Father.........
Lord.........God...................Father..............God............Father..............Lord.......
God.........God.........Father.................God..............Lord....................Lord...........
.......Amen

I have no idea what she said during the "............" because all I could focus on was how many times she was using God, Lord, and Father as commas. Since when did we decide to use God's name as a way to begin and end a sentence or connect two sentences together. Is this proper English? Could there be a more distracting way of praying?

Reader, as I close out this post, Audience, I just want to take time, Reader, to encourage you to not use God as a comma, Friend, and think more about what you are saying, Blog Follower, when you pray, Earthling, and not just babble, Homosapien, as some have the tendency to do, Evolved Primate, and by the way, Person, thank you for the food. Amen. So be it.

Once Upon a Time...

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl said, 'NO!'

And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted.

THE END


-Don't you just love getting email forwards from your uncle? I'd change golf to softball and then I'd drink a lot of Snapple instead of beer and scotch because I don't like beer and scotch, which probably makes me less of a man in some people's eyes. But I'd fart a bunch to make up for it.